Don't pee on Mrs. Barkley

I had a reservation at Tucanos and I really had to pee. There was no bathroom in sight. I ran out side and asked a nice women where a bathroom was. She pointed to the top of this hill and gave a warning, "Don't pee on Mrs. Barkely or Mrs. Barkely will pee on you." So I was like "Okay" and headed up the hill. All the womens bathroom stalls were taken except for one, but it had a hairy dog cuddled up inside of the toilet bowl (P.S the dog is Mrs. Barkely) so I went in the mens bathroom. I walked in and saw President Monson consulting his nephew to not smoke, so I left. Well I ended up peeing on Mrs. Barkely. I ran as fast as I could down the hill, and Tucanos still didn't have my table ready.